dani_meows | (no subject)

I am so anxious today. My chest hurts. My tongue is numb.

I have a valid reason for my anxiety. Jasper's surgery is soon. This Thursday. I am so afraid. I regret Miso's surgery last year. Even though it was the best chance we had of him living to see six years of age. Unfortunately he was one of ten percent of cats who don't survive multiple urinary tract blockage followed by PU surgery.

This is a different thing but in some ways it's the same. Money is tight. The cat is ill and it all comes down to this treatment.

I also feel bad they have to open the healed area to reopen it. But even if they'd found it earlier we would have had to wait because cats should not go under more than once in a month.

Especially a senior boy with kidney disease.

I want to believe they will successfully remove all the melanoma cells. That they will be successful.

That a few weeks from now I'll be blogging about something random maybe my thoughts on anime or books or literally anything with Jazzy beside me like he is right now. Nori and Boo next to him. My three cat boys having a sleep while their sister plots world domination for endless supplies of ice cream and macaroni noodles.

But I'm scared. Is it my anxiety disorder? Maybe yes? Maybe no.