My bathroom smells of lavender and peppermint

Been lost in my own thoughts again.

Depression was winning. I always get depressed in this season of families are never dysfunctional and if you don't have a relationship with your family something is wrong with you...message that goes around during the holidays. I distance myself from my family as a form of protection if I don't keep putting myself out there waiting for them to love me, it doesn't hurt when they do not love me... when they don't reply back... when both sets of parents show that they love one sibling but don't seem to love me.

I love Christmas music, Thanksgiving and Christmas decorations but the other stuff that goes along with it... Yeah could live without the guilt. You don't contact your family? You don't visit only to hear about how everything you do is wrong, and how you and your husband won't be a family until you have children of your own...

Yeah my anxiety disorder and bipolar disorder is enough of a problem without allowing all that into my life again.


I managed to motivate myself into scrubbing the bathroom with the all natural cleaners I whipped up, my bathroom smells like peppermint and lavender with the slightest hint of lemon. My sink sparkles.

That's more motivation then I've had in days.

This however did make me grin and feel better about the world:
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